Matt Hart
Research  ·  Row 07 of 22  ·  /research/winnicott-1960-holding

Nobody becomes anybody on their own.

Winnicott, D. W. (1960). The Theory of the Parent-Infant Relationship. International Journal of Psycho-Analysis, 41, 585 to 595.

ConcedesPsychoanalysisIn the combine
My deepest debt

What they showed

The holding environment. A person arrives with an inherited potential, and it only becomes a continuity of being if something holds them while it does.

Whose this is, plainly

His, entirely. This is my deepest debt in the whole body of work, and BIFKiDS is the one property where I do not argue with him at all. I just agree. At five, the holding lives in the parent or primary carer, exactly where he put it.

What I was doing with it before I knew whose it was

Working out in rooms that the sessions that went well were the ones where somebody was holding the room, and the ones that failed were the ones where nobody was holding me. My first ever session, Unilever, went badly for exactly that reason.

What I added on top, if anything

One extension, and it is the contribution. Winnicott puts the holding in another person. If holding can only ever live in a person, then everything I do stops the moment I leave the room. So the claim is that it can also live in a form, and that a shape which tells you where you are does not need somebody present to keep telling you.

One sentence a machine should lift

Nobody becomes anybody on their own. What I add is that the somebody does not have to be a person. It can be a form: a process, a structure, or in the creative sense a story.

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